So there is this guy that I met at a party a few months back.  We hit it off, he asked from my number, but then I didn’t hear from him.  Since at the time I was just starting to get involved with someone else, I didn’t really think anything of it.  Just as that short-lived thing that was starting back then was imploding, I ran into this guy again at a bar.  He came up and seemed super excited to see me, said we should hang out soon, and then I never heard anything.  So I ran into him a couple of nights ago and he came up to me again and said hi, and mentioned that he had texted me asking if I was there.  At which point a realization dawned on me, and I asked, “What number do you have for me?”  My number was one digit off in his phone, and he had apparently been texting me and not getting any responses, and was still miraculously super nice and friendly and not awkward every time we ran into each other.

The point of this story is that he just asked me to get a drink with him tonight, and while I would actually kind like to spend more time with him and see if there is any long-term chemistry there, the thought of a one-on-one first date scenario kind of breaks me out in hives/makes me feel like vomiting and I don’t want to do it.  Also I’m not sure that I want to date at all right now, for various reasons, including the fact that I am an introvert and I have so much going on already at the moment and I don’t know that I’m up for that kind of emotional exertion?  Like the last time I did it was because I didn’t feel horrible at the thought of it, but that happens like once in a million years and starting out with new people is fucking HARD.  

If I had some friends that were “coincidentally” already hanging out tonight and could invite him along in a low-pressure situation, that would be ideal.

Life is surprisingly good right now.

Just got my acceptance letter to my transfer school, so I will be starting there in the fall…  Two more years of undergrad.  The past two have absolutely flown by.  I’m looking forward to being challenged, and to going somewhere that actually suits my needs.

Postcards are going to start rolling out soon.  One magical late night made everything come together, and now I’m started on an exciting new venture that can be simultaneously creatively and financially beneficial.  I hope they do well enough that I can continue to branch out, but either way it’s exciting and fun.

Work is wonderful.  I’m reminding myself constantly that I get more out of it when I fully engage, even on rough days.  Taking a deep breath and being kind to people, even when they are frustrating, has rewards more often than not.  Throwing myself into projects even when I’m tired makes me feel happy and revitalized.  Sinking into a state of not-doing just drags me further down.

I have wonderful friends who give me support and love and remind me that I deserve good things when I need to be reminded.  

I’m getting up earlier and eating better and reading more and doing more and spending more time alone, all of which is bringing me joy and creating the kind of life I want.

Today I read and analyzed Toni Morrison over breakfast.  I’m going to work on a short story, and then dive into more schoolwork, including some delicious literature research.  There will be pie-baking as well, and then tonight a dance party and lots of wine with my coworkers.  

There is a cat purring on my lap and infinite opportunities for personal and professional growth in my future.  

So I had been trying to figure out how to lower the cost of my postcards, and I just figured out how, so three postcard designs have been ordered and will hopefully start being sold sooooon.

The first three that will be rolled out:

(I have more designs that I will order when the next paycheck rolls around, but initial costs are a bit high so I can’t do it right off.)

I have two places that will be selling them.  I haven’t sought other places, but it’s always an option if I decide I want to do so in the future.

I am super excited!  But now I have to figure out how I want to brand myself.  The Royal Undead Postcard Company?  Kendra’s Magical Postcard Emporium?  Send me some ideas if you feel so inspired!  It can be irreverent, since I am (at least for now) only selling to a contained group who enjoy a bit of fun and games — and intend to enjoy some fun and games for a while yet.

Tonight after work:

  • Go by Target to exchange faulty coffee filter.
  • Try very hard not to buy any more home decorative stuff.
  • Fail, because I really want another small throw rug for my reading chair.
  • Complete reading/discussion board post for World Lit
  • Complete Annotated Bibliography for World Lit
  • Maybe make a giant pan of macaroni and cheese.  Maybe just heat up leftover tortellini.  
  • Curl up and read The Mysterious Benedict Society and the Prisoner’s Dilemma.

heylabodega:

The clearest thing in the world to me right now is that anyone who makes you feel bad about about anything that makes you happy, is highly suspect.

It’s little things and big things and the way you live your life and what you spend your money on and how you spend your time and how you use your social media. What you read and what you watch. What you listen to. What tattoos you get, what they represent. If you drink sugary coffee drinks or black coffee. If you want to instagram your cup of coffee. How excited are you about exercise? How excited about food? How much you enjoy planning vacations. How animated you get talking about old movies. How much you love something everyone else loves could you be any more basic? How much you love something off the beaten path what are you a hipster? Why do you get manicures, why don’t you? Why don’t you date? Why do you sleep with so many people? Why are you so happy about this thing and not that thing? You’re just kidding about liking that, right?

The good people? They might make fun. But only gently, fondly. With the good people, it’s clear that they love you so much more for the things they’re ribbing. Everybody else can fuck off.  Fondly.

(via thesarcasmstore)

Source: heylabodega

I’m spring cleaning.

Listening to country music and clearing out some unnecessary things, both physically in the form of unpacked boxes and general clutter, and mentally as far as things and people in my life that are not contributing much of anything good.  I’ve been mulling over the latter for a week or so, and now it just seems right.

It feels fabulous.

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I registered (and paid) for classes yesterday!

I’m taking a few classes this summer to finish up the credits I need to transfer in the fall. 

May 22-June 26: Health and Wellness and Intro to Political Science (both online), and then Nature Hiking, which runs until July 18 but only meets Tuesdays from 12-4 and should be a fun thing to do this summer.  I am surrounded by awesome woods and hiking spots, WHY DO I NEVER GET OUT THERE?

Essay draft started, with no idea about what I was going to write: 8AM.

Essay draft submitted: 11:45AM.

Thankfully this was just a draft and did not have to be a completed essay.

Special thanks go out to my roommate, who made me breakfast and brought it to me at my desk so I didn’t starve and didn’t have to stop working.

Now on to French homework, and then shower and run down to get my Environmental Bio textbook from the car before rushing to take the test that I just realized was due Friday and hope that she will still accept since it is open in Moodle until midnight tonight.

And then I will do whatever the fuck I want with the rest of the day, which will probably involve curling up in my chair by the window with a blanket and watching bad tv.

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